Who Do You Think You Are?

Whatever Paul McAllister achieved, it was never enough. He was successful at many things, but his heart was always unsettled. The accolades and achievements never fully satisfied him, so the job was never done. If he had recognized how unquenchable his thirst for fulfillment was, he might have slowed down to find out why. He might have recognized that his life had been an unending, futile mission to fill that void. But he was too busy, always looking for the next thing—the next mountain to climb, the next business to acquire, even just a single-digit handicap.

What was Paul’s problem? Like all human beings, he had experienced heartaches and disappointments earlier in life that left him feeling empty. He tried to fill that emptiness by basing his identity on his performance. It’s a common tendency, but it never works because performance is never absolute. It keeps changing. There’s always more to accomplish and always the possibility of falling short. Our own performance can only satisfy us for a moment before we start to feel empty again.

The root of this problem is self-perception—how we see ourselves when we look in the mirror. If we don’t recognize who we are, how God made us, and how he sees us, we spend our lives trying to become “somebody.” When we base our identity on our performance, we tend to expect perfection and end up disappointed. But when we realize that we are already “somebody” in God’s eyes—a person made in his image whom he thoroughly loves—we are set free. We may want to perform well, but we don’t have to in order to prove our worth. Like golfers who play simply for the joy of the game, we are free to live without the pressure of proving who we are.

Questions: It is often said that when we base our identity on our performance, we become “human doings” rather than human beings. Can you relate to this dynamic? In what ways have you tried to become “somebody” through the things you accomplish or the people you know?